Aside from my obvious desire to promote my own intelligence through overly-wordy titles and opening sentences, another thing I picked up from the 90’s was a completely irrational and unfounded love for shopping while floating very far above the earth. And by shopping I mean musing about which garden gnome would fit best on my porch.

Many share this instinct, thanks only to SkyMall, the thing you look at before the safety cards that really, really should have been read first. But no more, because SkyMall has declared bankruptcy, citing the many digital shopping alternatives as the magazine’s decline in revenue over the past few years. By no means does this guarantee the magazine is going to disappear from airplane passenger seats anytime soon, but the likelihood is this is the first step in a ridiculously drawn-out memorial service.

When the FAA finally expanded the use of personal electronics during passenger flights in late 2013, nails somewhere gained their own powers of flight and went all homing pigeon on a coffin.

Here we are now, a looming SkyMall-less future, and the reactions of the internet are of the decidedly predictable variety. We will miss you. We loved you. What will the world be without you? The thing is, the answer is quite simple. The world will be better, because this is progress and antiquated products are supposed to burn and die in the uncompromising inferno of capitalism. The companies that fail to change with urgency, like Blockbuster, deserve to burn and die alongside their bygone business model.

In the end, SkyMall never made a case for itself in the digital age, despite it’s only existing for the past 25 years. This isn’t a hallowed newspaper crumbling under the weight of its own history, this is a magazine which, at the age of 25, hadn’t developed a personality beyond complete randomness, like a recent graduate wandering aimlessly in the world with a degree completely detached from his or her personality.

Not to spit on somebody’s grave, but hooray for change. Death to frivolous airplane paper. And better yet, we have the plot for the sequel to that depressing George Clooney movie. The one with planes.

SkyMall Joins Blockbuster in the Annals of Consumer Anachronisms